How do you say you love someone but you don't trust? I say why don't you trust the person you say you love? What's that? You say you don't trust anyone.
When that happened to me, I felt the worst kind of betrayal. And it came from the one person I would have given my life for, or at the very least would have trusted with my life.
Those are the lessons that come from pain.
I'm faithful to my friends and my lovers of the past. I am trustworthy. I am worthy of your love and your trust. I give all of my heart to those I love, and if you're important in my life, you can be pretty sure I love you. I find it very dark when someone treats me as though they have a reason not to trust me. And then I wonder if the darkness comes from them and not me?
People are quick to ask how I can say I love them. I think because I don't always see love in the familial sense or in the sexual sense. I can say I don't see love at all. I feel love, and my heart learns to love people by their honesty, their deeds and the words they choose to use with others. I feel love in how genuine they are, and how often I am blessed to see the child within and the happiness and light that radiates into my world. Those are not easy to fake. That's how I trust.
Trust comes with the love. It's a by-product of a genuine heart and a willingness to love someone for the person they are, and not the person you want to see them as. If I've lost my trust in someone, I will lose my love too. For me, one cannot live without the other.
Do I sometimes love or trust the wrong people? Of course. But what is the alternative? To live in the darkness of mistrust or hate? That's not for me. I need people in my life and I look hard for those I can trust and love. Without judgment. It's my life and I choose love over hate all day long. ~TM

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